These Robin Williams Quotes Will Make You Laugh

Close-up of Robin Williams' face. He is laughing exaggeratedly.

“Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?”

-Robin

(Photo: JoonHo Son/Public domain)


“Politics: ‘Poli’ a Latin word meaning ‘many’; and ‘tics’ meaning ‘bloodsucking creatures.’”

Robin Williams

“You know the difference between a tornado and divorce in the south? Nothing! Someone is losing a trailer.”

Robin Williams

“If it’s the Psychic Network, why do they need a phone number?”

Robin Williams

“And the French! The French have a bomb too! Maybe they have the Michelin Bomb. Ah! Only destroys restaurants under four stars!”

Robin Williams
Photo of Robin. He is smiling sweetly at the camera.

“Cricket is basically baseball on valium.”

-Robin

(Photo: Eva Rinaldi/CCBYSA2.0)

“A woman would never make a nuclear bomb. They would never make a weapon that kills, no, no. They’d make a weapon that makes you feel bad for a while.”

Robin Williams

“Some people say Jesus wasn’t Jewish. Of course he was Jewish! Thirty years old, single, lives with his parents, come on. He works in his father’s business, his mom thought he was God’s gift. He’s Jewish. Give it up.”

Robin Williams

“Divorce is expensive. I used to joke they were going to call it ‘all the money’ but they changed it to alimony.”

Robin Williams
Photo of Robin. He looks mischievous, with a sparkle in his eye. He is having fun.

[Imitating a French person]
“F**k you Americans! Uncultured, crass Americans! We hate all of you!
F**k the Germans are here! Hello, Americans! We love you!”

-Robin

(Photo: John Mathew Smith/CCBYSA2.0)

“When I told my father I was going to be an actor, he said, ‘Fine, but study welding just in case.’”

Robin Williams

Marriage is a triumph of imagination over intelligence.”

Robin Williams

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2021-06-07
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